A Parents' Hope

1) I married at a young age of 24 years old. Praise be to Allah for granted me a daughter. As other parents who wish to see their sons / daughters grow healthy and happy all the time - it goes to me too as a father. Every parent wants the best for their loved one.

My everything!!

2) My daughter, she is an active person at home. She seems has no problem with the people she doesn't know, she can assimilate and to be happy at all times. However, when at TASKA, she seems otherwise. She is no longer active and more to troublesome. I noticed her feeling was not stable after she was infected with flu / cough and fever. She changed a lot! I am so sorry with her especially when she is at TASKA with uncertainty and sad (crying).

3) My daughter was infected with flu plus coughing and fever for over 2 months. She knows how to protest her uncertainty with crying. I couldn't bear to see her on that way. However, my sister-in-law was asked to come to look after her while she was not well. I was happy with her, with happy face and active in my sister-in-law supervision. She seems has no problem with the new person.

4) My conversations with my wife about it spread into some reasons: 

I) Attention
It may be because of the attention given to her. In TASKA, she got no attention and nobody entertained her as how she was treated at home. I don't say that the TASKA management failed to play their role to make sure everyone satisfied and comfortable. The number of children they're looking after are many and I find out that over 50 children overall. So, they have no enough staff to make sure every guardians or carers look after only a child. It would be possible if we hire a guardian with thousands payment. But, we can't afford for that and our last option is to send our children to nursery / TASKA.

ii) Strangers Anxiety
We also believe that she might have a feeling of strangers anxiety. We know, she knows nobody in the TASKA. For all these while, she's been knowing us as her biological parent. Strangers Anxiety happen when  a child realizes that no familiar appearances are around. Then, she feels unsecured and sometimes scared.

ii) Separation Anxiety

This anxiety connected to the strangers anxiety when she find out her parent is not around but new faces appeared. She can't accept that she's been separated there with no abah and ibu. When there's no security guaranteed as what she feels when with her parent, the best way to demonstrate her feeling is through crying.

iv) Abuse

My wife and I are thinking that there might be because she's been abused by someone in the TASKA. This due to her action when she keep on telling me she's scared. My question is that; what scares are you telling me my dear? What reasons until she keep repeating me the same word especially when we go home from TASKA. My mind is overwhelmed with that word. However, I have no idea whether she actually has been abusing since she enrolled to the TASKA. I'm still looking for the proof before I can take any action.

5) Thus, I try to find solutions on how to cure the feeling of uncertainty at the TASKA. First of all; I visit the TASKA while nobody know my attendance especially at noon. I observe her from far and I check whether she's being abused or not. I also check how condition is she when nobody she know around her. The result is that; everything is under control and there's no any possibility to say my daughter's being abused. So,I can say there must be other reasons.

6) My next action to cure her feeling is try to convince her that TASKA is the best place with many friends and many activities to be played together. Keep telling at her ears that what she feels at TASKA is totally different and the environment is more wonderful with friends. I see she understands and started to admit my fact is true and her assumptions totally wrong.

7) I also pray to The Almighty Allah so that she will be strong and calm with new environment. I believe, prayers will have power to change people but the first step we must take is effort. 

My Lalin'